hello stranger

omg i haven't been here in ages.

don't think anyone comes here anymore considering it's been dead for 2 months. but oh how my life has changed so drastically in those 2 months. for one i've moved. and another thing is, i might actually have officially gone mad.

for you see, those of you who know me, know what a safe skeptic i am. about everything. about life, about love, about whether suckling pig is indeed roasted. but in 2 weeks, i'm going on a holiday, my agenda and excitement hardly masked by my usual cautiousness. and when i return in 3 weeks, i may be yet another new person, or maybe revert to the old cautious skeptic i've always assumed myself to be.

i guess that's the thing about life, we never know when what will hit us. this year has started and already i've felt a million emotions i hardly felt in the whole of last year. i'd forgotten that i could feel certain ways, that excitement could be almost as excruciating as boredom. i'd forgotten what it was like to let my heart skip a beat when i anticipated anything at all. i was boring.

and maybe i still am.

but now, there seems to be the birth of a new person within me. i've decided that caution sometimes has to be let go, and that living is more important now, more than ever. i've decided that i only have a short time to be young and rash and naive, and to make decisions that i could regret, but only for that limited period of time. i've decided that other people's opinions of me don't have to matter, and that i can do what i want, as long as i'm accountable to myself.

and yet, through all these decisions, i'm still confused.

:)